Posted on : 13-12-2011 | By : admin | In : Pregnancy
Let me explain my situation to you first…
Just a few months ago, my daughter was in the hospital suicidal. She’s now on an anti-depressant and she’s been much happier. She has her occasional “downs” but she usually gets through them all right. I thought everything was going well, until she broke the news to me that she’s pregnant.
She’s very upset, and she’s told me that she wants to get an abortion. I, personally, don’t believe in abortion. But I’m afraid if she doesn’t get one, she’ll hurt herself and her baby.
If you were in my shoes, what would you do?
(I already posted this in “Pregnancy”…I posted it here for a vairety of answers. In case you’re wondering.) Thanks.
I think this is the wrong place to be asking such a hard question. Maybe u should talk to a professional.
Try talking to her about giving the baby up for adoption if she doesn’t want to keep it.
Adoption is better. The baby shouldn’t die! That is what you are trying to avoid by having the abortion, right?
If she’s already suicidal, what will the guilt of living with the fact that she killed her unborn baby do to her?
edit: I love how people give me thumbs down for the truth. Oh well. Keep them coming. Giving me a thumbs down isnt going to change the fact that abortion is murder, whether you choose to see it or not.
no thats killing a life
its her baby but it might ruin her future if she is taking care of a abay instead of like college and high school……maybe an adoption?
DONT let her get an abortion. a baby only has ONE shot at life and she shouldnt screw it up becuase she made a mistake. talk to her and tell her why you honestly dont want her to get an abortion
Let her have the abortion
better that than a possibility of her doing much worse to herself good luck and best wishes
she should not have gotten pregnant in the first place that young
discuss with her that adoption can be an option, also ask her if the father could support the baby, or take care of it permanently.
Possibly talk to her about giving it up for adoption, I dont believe in abortions either, i would simply explain to her that it isnt the babies fault that she didnt use protection and that if she doesnt want to care for it someone that cant have kids will… Im sure she is scared adn doesnt know where to look but maybe you can explain to her that you will be there for her and help her thru it, then maybe she will want to keep it and look forward to it…
leave her alone and let her do what she wants. she is old enough to make her own decisions
No, you should not. If she is depressed now, having an abortion is not going to help. She should put the baby up for adoption.
No, I know that she is hurting and is up set. But as time goes by she and you both will be okay. I would have a long talk with her tog get a feel or where her head is The stress of having an abortion is very hard on many women . Some never really get over it. I don’t know how strong your daughter is but I wish you all the best.
definitely let her get an abortion. an unwanted child is much worse than any damage an abortion does. please, the responsibility will be awful for your daughter, the child and for you. she is not ready to be a parent or even a partial parent. this is really an appropriate circumstance for an abortion.
very hard..
you must talk about it.
but my opinion is yes
she is too young
and i dont think she will be able to cope…
best of luck.
I would let her get the abortion [I don't like them either] because you don’t want your daughter to harm herself and she isn’t mature enough to give a safe-birth.
[Catherine]
p.s. Adoption is bad, because there are already too many baby’s up for adoption, there are not enough families willing to adopt and let go with this stupid “let her learn her lesson” crap. You don’t want to harm your child to learn a stupid lesson.
well i think you shouldn’t and let her learn from her mistakes well thats jus my oppion
Yes, you should allow it, because it is her choice.
Since she is not of legal age, she will need your permission.
I don’t believe in it either, but does the father know? Does he want it too? Well if thats really what she wants and isnt going to regret it. I guess its ok.
yes..u should..im pro-choice,but i believe that if ur daughter wants an abortion than let her have one..she is not likely to make the same mistake twice..give her a chance at some normalcy in life..high school, college..career…if not ur gonna have child who has a child with no real chances of a future
if SHE wants the abortion, then let her have it. she is too young to have the responsibility of a baby(you too!!).
she needs to get HERSELF adjusted to her psychological issues first. a baby can always come again later! i have two daughters (10 &11); and if they ever got a teen pregnancy, they ARE getting an abortion!
Yes, but you have to take care of her and the father has to take care of the baby, I’m speaking about the medical bills.. If only you paid more attentions to your daughter..!
Do not let her get an abortion. Abortion is wrong, it is basically murder. If you let her get an abortion, then she will have to live with it for the rest of her life. It is her own fault for what happened.
I think you should let your daughter have an abortion. It may not be what you believe, but in the long run it will be better for you and your daughter. Also you wont be worring about her and whether she can cope etc…
good luck!
x
she should be able to decide what she wants to do. but u say what u want her to do, and ask her why or why not she doesn’t wanna do it. you should let her get an abortion if U feel it is rite
I do not think that this is an answer that you should let her decide on her own. It sounds as if she has had some recent difficulties and could use a strong adult voice in her life. I would seek more professional opinion to answer this question because the answer, no matter what it is, will change your daughters life forever.
Abortion than sterilization.
Abortion is the ultimate betrayal of a mother(which she will never be), and she should be taken out of the “loop”, really.
I would say support her. I know personally how much animosity there is if you don’t. You are right to think there could be problems. She’s not ready to take care of a child if she was just trying to hurt herself.
i would 100% allow this abortion – i would put the mental health & welfare of my daughter first…as a matter of urgency & try to ensure she gets fully well.
i really do wish you & your daughter well…its tough being a mum sometimes eh?!!
I believe that she should carry the child to term and put it up for adoption. Then you should have a frank discussion with her about birth control.
no way abortions are wrong its killing a human that never had the chance to live. tell her that having the baby is a punishment or something. if she gets mad say what if i had had an abortion with you. then you wouldnt be here. but definately dont let her!
Let her. She’s too emotionally fragile to deal with being pregnant and having a baby, and the hormones, etc. will play havoc with her. Ever hear of “baby blues”? You could be looking a postpartum depression that lasted YEARS.
OK, I understand you don’t believe in abortion. I’m not a big fan, either, although I am not so adamant as some. But in this case — definitely yes.
I’d probably tell her to stop to think for a minute. If she does something to herself, well, it’s herself. But by getting an abortion, she’s hurting someone else, that even though is in her, it’s NOT her. I’d try to talk her out of it until she can have the baby and put it for adoption.
if she may hurt her and the child then its a hard question….
I think it would be a good lesson in responsibility to talk to her about straightening up for 9 months, and putting the baby up for adoption. And call that baby daddy’s parents!
I can’t imagine how I would handle this if my daughter was in this situation. They’re still young, but this question is going to keep me up at night!
I wouldn’t get an abortion. She’s to young and it’ll hurt her body and possibly chances of ever getting pregnant again. See your doctor about natural ways of curing the depression during the pregnancy.
Not sure how far along she is in the pregnancy, but if she does not want the baby, and is fairly far along, talk to her about adoption. She could give the baby to someone as soon as she delivers.
Don’t ask us, ask a family pastor/priest/friend/counselor/whatever, your question is WAY too personal and important for some strangers on the internet to answer for you.
Since your daughter has been depressed lately, I think that you’re right. I usually don’t believe in abortion either, but many worse things could happen if she decides to keep the baby.
However, if your child is okay with having the baby and giving it up for adoption, that would work out pretty well too, unless she doesn’t want the pains of labor and pregnancy.
Good luck with whatever option you do choose and I hope that your daughter will get better with time.
hmm well i really dont know wat i would do. but if i was her mother maybe i would have to let her get abortion because 15 is a really young age to have a kid and she won’t be ready. on the other hand, its not right to kill a poor innocent child. so im really srry….
I think ultimately it is your daughter’s decision. Talk it out with her. Weigh the pros and cons. Tell her how difficult it can be to get an abortion and to live with that. Tell her how difficult it can be to be a teenage mom.
What about adoption?
Whatever she or yall both choose just make sure it’s well thought out and not done as a spur of the moment choice. Make sure she fully understands whatever it is she chooses.
Unless you are prepared to take the baby and raise it. If she is having that many mental problems she is definitely a danger to herself and would be to the child.
I think you both need to go to some sort of counselling. No-one on here is really qualified to answer this one. If I was 15 I wouldnt want to keep the baby, but I’ve never had an abortion so dont know the stress that one could cause. If she does decide to go ahead with it, I think you will have to respect her wishes. Good luck and I hope everything works out.
Too be honest i dont think she will be happy with the abortion down the line. She might want it now, but it could make her depression A LOT WORSE.If she does not want the baby, put the child up for adoption(and it will be hard to do).Talk to her about her adoption or keeping the baby and mention aboriton and why she wants one.
I would let her do that; not a strong believer in abortion for any reason or just because but this is one of those cases where it appears to me that it is as much common sense and concern for the “mother” that it would be done. The key is that she wants one and needs to put the past problems behind her; if she wanted to have it and give it up for adoption that would be an alternative but since she doesn’t I would let her do as she chooses and support her in that decision.
don’t let her do it , hold her responsible for her actions. plus abortion is very wrong. she might figure that out and feel very guilty and try suicide again based on what you said. give her full support though and hopefully everything will be ok.
you shouldn’t let her get one because it may make her feel worse to know that she killed a baby….
at least try to have her give birth to it so you can put it up for adoption
or have her carry it some of the way and get a c-section….
tell her about all the negative effects of abortion
maybe she will change her mind.
Look to yourself but remember “one lost one wounded”.
I felt ( and feel ) really sad after reading your question. Yes, under the circumstances, I would allow your daughter to have an abortion. She’s very young and too emotional to handle it on her own; even if she did carry it to term. (It might make her suicidal symptoms worse during the pregnancy.) If I were in your shoes, I’d let her do it. I am pro choice, but your daughter sounds as if she is severe emotional discomfort. Good luck to you, sweetie.